Fun Games For When You're...

…Sitting at a Table

     The Game is called "Finger Guesser," a fun game where all you need is a set of hands.

     Player 1 takes his hands and folds them together with the fingers going in between each other. He then takes one finger and hides it between his hands and adjusts his fingers to fill in the hidden fingers gap. Player two is then shown the clasped hands from straight on and has 3 seconds to examine the hand before player 1 hides his hands under the table. Player two guesses and then takes the role of finger hider.

     In the event of a tie, the players play sudden death where they both hide a finger and show it to each other at the same time. The first to guess wins the tie breaker.

…At Subway

      This is a simple game that is easy to win. All you need is a cooperative Subway employee. After ordering a meatball sub, the employee will ask you if that’s all you want on it. You then answer “Yes! I will have a pickle, just one pickle, put it anywhere you want and don’t tell me where it is,” then turn your back on them.
     The employee will be confused so it helps to bring a friend to assure them that you are in your right mind. When eating the sandwich, simply yell “Found the pickle!” when you find it and you win! Only the worst of players could lose this game. The game is more fun when you forget you’re playing.

…Sitting in Church

     This is a fun game to play at church when a southern gospel quartet sings for special music. If you don’t know any of the members of the band, try to guess who is singing the bass part. All of their lips are moving together so this proves to be more difficult than you’d think. Once you have your guess, put all of your energy into focusing on your selected bass-man. If they do solos, which they eventually will, this can prove to be hilarious if the person you pegged as a bass starts belting an incredibly high vocal part.

…Around The House

      This game won't always work, but it can be fun. It’s called “say goodbye to someone for the day and then return very soon and don’t say anything and see what they think you mean by that”

     I did it to my sister today. After saying goodnight to her I went to the bathroom and brushed my teeth. After a few minutes I opened her bedroom door and gave her a blank look with a hint of “raised eyebrow.” She looked at me, I looked at her, she looked at me, and I looked at her. Then she said “What? Did somebody pee?”
     I instantly knew that she spoke of our dogs who have been known to lift their legs in corners, but out of context that is a weird thing to ask.

…On Facebook
     This game is called "facebook bingo." The rules are simple, at the part of your screen where it shows your notifications, friend requests, and messages, just try to get at least on of each. Based on difficulty to attain, I’ve created a scoring system:
     Notification=1 pt.
     Message=5 pts.
     Friend Request=10 pts.
     The best I’ve ever gotten was Friend Requests: 5, Messages: 2, Notification: 52 which equals 112 pts.
     I would have a hard time believing that I’m the first to ever play this game, but I don’t know anyone who’s played it so I’m going to say I invented it!

If you have any fun stories or high scores that you want to share, share them at https://www.facebook.com/Freewayparade or tweet them to @freewayparade.
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Illnesses That People Claim To Have When They Really Don't

     When I'm sick or bored I spend my free time coming up with lists in my head. Not usually of anything important, just things that I believe deserve to be in some sort of order that I decide makes sense. Last summer I caught a bad cold and out of boredom created a new list that I like to call "The Top 5 Illnesses, Mental Disorders, and Problems That People Claim to Have When They Really Don't."


5. Narcolepsy
    Narcolepsy is a chronic neurological disorder caused by the brain's inability to regulate sleep-wake cycles normally. But to the Narcoleptic wanna-be, it means that they are a little bit tired.


4. A.D.D.
     Attention Deficit Disorder is a type of attention deficit hyperactivity disorder characterized primarily by inattentive concentration or a deficit of sustained attention, such as procrastination, hesitation, and forgetfulness. But to the A.D.Deceiver, it is merely a case of a short attention span.

3. Carpal Tunnel Syndrome
     A surprising addition to the list, but heard complained about just as often, is Carpal Tunnel Syndrome. To the Carpal Tunnel Sydro-misinformed, (these puns are getting bad) this condition is not a numbness, tingling, weakness, or a damaging of muscles to the hand and fingers caused by excessive pressure on the median nerve, but simply a word to describe a hand cramp from texting six pages of text to your best friend without a break.


2. Anything-oholic
     When in reality, alcoholism is a serious problem that hurts people physically and emotionally, there are many over-exaggerate-oholics who like to describe something they love as an addiction like shopping or chocolate.


1. O.C.D.
     Think back to one day ago, the odds are, in the last 24 hours, you've heard someone claim to be O.C.D. 5 times. That's not true... But it seems like it! The truth is, the Obsessive Compulsive Di-liars forget what O.C.D. stands for and don't realize that you can have the O, but without the C you don't have the D. What I mean is that being a neat freak doesn't make you O.C.D. it makes you a neat freak, being a germaphobe doesn't make you O.C.D. it makes you a germaphobe. What classifies someone as O.C.D. is their unwanted and repeated obsessions that make them driven to have compulsions.


And there we have it, the Top Five Illnesses and disorders... that... people... lie about... Okay I made that name up on the spot earlier. The point is, that is my list. I am not an expert in these problems, I'm merely a guy who noticed that other people think they are.


(This list is dedicated to my sister, Lindsay, who told me this was a dumb list when I first showed her. I'm still not convinced it's not.)